On Criticism

A "Quiet Zone" sign where someone has crossed out "noise" and handwritten "TROLLING" above it.

Criticism: “The expression of disapproval of someone or something based on perceived faults or mistakes.” -Google Definition; “The act of criticizing usually unfavorably.” -Merriam-Webster Definition

Criticism has many different contexts and is helpful in some contexts (criticizing literary or artistic works, Biblical criticism, etc). The criticism I am concerned with is under the umbrella of the two definitions given above. And of those two definitions, the words I want to focus on most are the words “perceived” and “unfavorably.”

Criticism is literally everywhere, especially these days with a multitude of platforms such as Social Media, Google and Yelp Reviews, Trip Advisor, Rotten Tomatoes; probably hundreds more! Most people will not go to a restaurant, stay in a hotel, or do business with a company that doesn’t have probably at least 3 out of 5 stars. There are word-of-mouth message boards, pages, and blogs everywhere. In my town of Gainesville, Florida, there is a noteworthy word-of-mouth message board on Facebook. There are aspects of it that are helpful, but I often see a lot of bashing going on. Gainesville Word-of-Mouth isn’t the only place where this is a problem, it seems like it’s nearly everywhere nowadays. I have noticed it more and more, which is why I have been thinking about it a lot lately.

Constructive criticism is very helpful. If you are a public speaker and someone sits in to take notes and give you feedback to make you a better public speaker, that’s constructive criticism! “Hey, I noticed you say ‘um’ a lot whenever you speak. Try to pay attention to times when you do that and try to eliminate it.” That’s constructive criticism. Here’s an example of “Destructive” criticism:

“XYZ ice cream sucks because it comes in rolled-form and I like mine scooped. Why would anybody want to eat that crap?”

We have all seen examples of destructive criticism. I see it constantly and more often than the former. This type of criticism is essentially slander re-packaged and is very harmful. Do you feel comfortable in a critical environment? I feel like we live in a time where we must walk on egg shells. One of the problems is perception. I know this is a big shocker, but our perception isn’t 100% accurate in any situation (due to our fallen nature, past life experiences, sin, etc.). Sometimes our perception can be completely off. Sometimes our perception isn’t off, we just get angry and bash people, places, organizations, etc. because we’re mad at them and want to make sure other people look at them unfavorably.

I think underneath this type of criticism is pride. Pride completely skews our perception. Unfortunately, we tend to gravitate or align ourselves with people that share a similar perception so that these perceptions may be reinforced and “justified.” I don’t expect non-Christians to disengage from this type of behavior. I don’t expect the world to refrain from criticism. It can’t and it won’t apart from divine intervention. Here are few things I do to try to combat criticism in my own heart:

  1. Give the benefit of the doubt. Give a person, a business, an organization, or whatever the benefit of the doubt. Try not to jump to conclusions too quickly and take everything at face-value. Remember, there are two sides to every story.
  2. Second chances. Obviously, there are some exceptions, but try to give someone or something a second chance. What if you caught a really good restaurant you visited for the first time on a “bad day.” I know for a fact, about once every five visits, even to my favorite restaurants, can be sub-par. People are not perfect (and neither are you), so don’t expect perfection.
  3. Pause. Be slow to speak. Look at your own perception of a person, place, or situation and test it to see if it’s even accurate. Talk to someone else wise and trustworthy (without slandering) to help you see if it’s accurate.
  4. Awareness of your own sins, weaknesses, and shortcomings. This is at the heart of humility. It is right to know where we fall short and to dwell on how graciously God has dealt with us. This will protect us from pride and foster a right humility. “Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!” (Romans 7:24-25)
  5. Pray. This is a big one. Pray that you would have a soft heart and that you would see things rightly and accurately–especially when emotions are involved.
  6. Read the Bible. This will lead you into truth and will give you guidance and wisdom on how to handle most situations.

I know there are many more practical things one can do to combat a critical heart. This is just a few. I will add, there is a difference between “trolling” and/or “bashing” and giving warning. Giving others caution and/or warning with the intentions of protecting someone or preventing someone from experiencing an unfavorable situation is a good thing. That is different. If you are being constructively critical for the good/benefit of others or a situation, that is different. But whatever you do, be slow to make assumptions or judgements. I think we can all agree we throw our words around way too carelessly (James 3:1-12). We will all give an account for every careless word we have ever spoken (Matthew 12:36-37). We cannot expect the world to use such caution with its words and actions, but these things ought not be so for Christians.